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Afro Ninja Redemption

True Blood Recap- Scratches

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Afro Ninja Redemption

July 3rd 2009 02:37

Afro Ninja Redeems Himself on Tosh.20

One of my new favorite shows of the summer, Tosh 2.0 on Comedy Central combines the hilarity of Youtube videos with witty sarcasm. One of the funniest and most brilliant segments of the show dealt with the legendary Youtube sensation, Afro Ninja . I remember giggling in glee watching it back in high school. Tosh gave Afro Ninja, aka Mark Hicks the chance to redeem himself by completing his standing back tuck (I think that's what it's called, I only have repeated viewings of Bring it On to assume that). But we also learned that Afro Ninja is a successful stunt man and had won as many as three awards! You can check it out here on the Tosh 2.0 website. While you are there, check out the hilarious Terrell Owens Apologizes video. He's sorry for the cash only policy at farmer's markets and I love him for it (I never carry cash).

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Posted By: Jess Scheuler - Category: No Category

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True Blood Recap- Scratches

June 29th 2009 23:09

MATURE CONTENT

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Posted By: Jess Scheuler - Category: No Category

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True Blood- Keep This Party Going

June 23rd 2009 02:14

In which Jason is everyone's favorite camper and Sookie gets taken for a ride....

We begin in the dungeon with Eric tossing a bloody limb at Lafayette. Hilariously, Eric demands to know how much blood is in his still tin-foiled hair, because Pam is gonna kill him for messing up her dye job. LaFayette makes it up to the Eric's office, where Eric sits on a stool wearing one of those salon capes (as if he needs to be protected from his own hair when he is covered in blood and entrails), while Eric continues to question him about the disappearance of Eddie. Eddie was the bored vampire who supplied him with blood to sell in exchange for LaFayette's "services". He was subsequently killed by Amy and inadvertently by Jason. But right now, Eric is having Lafayette thrown back into the dungeon until he knows what happened to Eddie. But Lafayette can't tell them what he doesn't know. Later, Lafayette is shot in the leg trying to escape Fangtasia and tries to convince Eric and Pam to change him into a vampire, as he is far more useful to them that way. But they decide to take a bite first.

Meanwhile, Jason is on a school bus on his way to Vampire hating camp. And everyone is SINGING. As if they were eight! And Jason, poor simple Jason, is radiant. The thing I love about him is how pure he seems, even when he's doing some very messed up things. He tries to make friends with a fellow hater/Abercrombie & Fitch model Luke. Things go sour with Luke when during a hot game of flag football, he gets jealous of Jason's wily moves on the field and he decides to play dirty. All that it takes is Jason's secret superpower, his six pack, to win the game, as he whips off his shirt and scores the winning touchdown. The Newlin's look on, full of Stackhouse love, as if they want to invite him over for a three-way.

Sookie and Bill fight about not fighting. And she tells him that he isn't treating Jessica like a person. But she's not a person. She's a vampire, Sookie. Geez. Also, Jessica's impressions of Bill are awesome. He leaves her alone for the night, so she suckers Sookie into letting her see her parent's house one last time. Since Sookie is a is a sucker both literally and figuratively, she drives her there.

Tara finds out that Eggs was in prison for many things, drugs, assault and being guilty of the second best abs on the show! But in the end she doesn't care, did I mention the abs? Maryann shows up at Merlotte's and proceeds to reek havoc on the locals by casting a magic spell making them all in heat. Sam tries to stand up for his bar, only to have her do her weird vibration thing and shifting him into a Collie. Sam, you got served. Sookie realizes something is not quite right with Maryann after listening to her thoughts and hearing a strange accent coming from them. And she invites Tara to move into the house with her.

Bill is getting hit on while shopping for some more "traditional" clothes for Jessica by the cougar looking saleslady when Eric shows up, with a shorter hairdo circa Brad Pitt in his Meet Joe Black phase. Needless to say, it looks hot. As does the track jacket, even hetero Bill notices and while they mutually check out Eric's hotness, the cougar saleslady assumes they are gay. Awesome. Even more awesome? Eric demands Sookie accompany him to Dallas to find a missing vampire sheriff. Predictably, Bill denies his demand, which at this point is useless, as there is no protecting Sookie from Eric's hotness. I have a feeling if you haven't fallen in love with Eric yet, you will next episode.

Jason keeps being hotter than a person should be at that creepy camp that just reminds me of the movie Saved! They have a blonde chick band play the camp, and at this point I fully expect to see Jenna Malone on keyboard and pastor Skip asking if they are down with the G-O-D? I digress. Then the Newlin's drag him on stage to "roleplay" and he snaps, nearly killing Mrs. Newlin after having flashbacks to vamp Eddie's death. But Mrs. Newlin was way too turned on by him nearly spearing her.

Jessica breaks her promise to stay in the car and Sookie runs in after her. She proceeds to call her mother "dumb" and tries to strangle her father for his past beatings of her with his belt. Bill shows up, glamors her little sister into letting him in and yells at Sookie to get the hell out before dealing with the family. How he's going to deal with it...tune in next week.

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Posted By: Jess Scheuler - Category: No Category

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True Blood: Fava Beans and a Nice Bottle of Sugar Blonde Highlights

June 18th 2009 00:33

True Blood: Fava Beans and a Nice Bottle of Sugar Blonde Highlights

You'll Be the Death of Me

We pick up where we left off at the end of last season with Tara and Sookie screaming at the sight of a dead body in the back of Detective Bellefleur's car. We can all breathe a sigh of relief that it isn't Lafayette. Thank you Alan Ball for not following the book on this one and killing off the best character on this show! It happens to be vodoo lady/corner pharmacy worker Miss Jeanette, who had her heart torn out and appeared to have been alive when it happened.

Andy Bellefleur spends the entire episode drunkenly trying to solve the crime that happened in his own backseat, grilling Tara over how she knew Miss Jeanette and random people in Merlottes. Are there ANY other bars in Bon Temps besides Merlottes? Just wondering. Anyways, Tara's mother shows up at the police station and mourns the death of Miss Jeanette and also refuses to believe that she was just a scammer who fed them peyote and epicac to induce "excorcisms". Maryann comes and picks her up in her adorable Ferris Bueller sportscar and dresses down Tara's Mom hardcore.

Meanwhile, a new love interest for Sam is hired at Merlottes and Sam is having a bit of a nervous breakdown over Maryann. He has flashbacks to when he was an adorable little beagle dog who looked like he just won the Westminster. He was also 17 and I'm not sure what the laws are down south, but it's highly untoward that Maryann was seducing him and turning into a human vibrator in the process. BTW, that was weird. He tries to return a plastic trash bag full of cash that he had stolen only to have her laugh in his face that her visit to Bon Temps has nothing to do with him.

It may have to do with Tara and Eggs, who enjoy eating exotic fruits by the pool and getting stoned at Maryann's Inn of Weirdness. They also kiss before they are interrupted my Maryann's servant man, who is in turn smacked by Maryann for offering them and ruining the mood. They do make up for it later by full on making out at Merlottes while Tara is bartending. Sam looks on completely confused.

Meanwhile Bill and Sookie break up and get back together a few times this epidsode when Sookie finds out A). That Bill didn't tell her about Jessica, the vampire he sired and B). That he killed her molesting Uncle Bartlett. Bill having to deal with new vampire Jessica was the funniest thing we've seen yet. "We recycle in this house!" he yells at her, while trying to combine different types of true blood to find something she'll drink, instead of people. Petulant Jessica falls under Sookie's spell immediately, all it takes is a person talking to her like a regular person, shocker! Sookie promises her a girls night and she happily agrees. Although she and Bill fight over the "killing my uncle" thing, they still get back together and get the sheets dirty with blood stains, ewww.

Jason Stackhouse is all about the Lord. Trying to make sense of the death of his V-junkie girlfriend Amy and his best friend killing people, he decides to follow the Fellowship of the Sun instead of his "family jewels". When Uncle Bartlett's body is found in the river, and he leaves all of this money (about 11K) to Sookie. Sookie doesn't want the money and hands it off to Jason who takes it as a sign of God that he was meant to use it for admittance to a Fellowship Bible camp.

Also confused is Lafayette who spends the episode in the darkness of a dungeon chained to some weird contraption. He's been there for days, and eventually one of the hick guys that he threw out of the bar and who burned down that house full of vampires is thrown in with him. He figures out that he is there to atone for dealing V-juice, until Eric enters the dungeon with highlighting tinfoils in his hair to eat the hick guy who tries to kill him with a silver cross. Funniest death ever. Don't mess with vikings. Or disturb their hair doin time.

Awesome season premiere.

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Posted By: Jess Scheuler - Category: No Category

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Recaps of My Favorite Shows!

June 17th 2009 23:10

Recaps of True Blood!

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Posted By: Jess Scheuler - Category: No Category

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Seven Pounds Vs Gran Torino

December 18th 2008 18:36

When I first saw the preview of the movie - Gran Torino, I was surprised that I hadn't seen the advert for the movie before then and till now I wonder why it was not as advertised as other movies.

Clint Eastwood played his part really well, it seemed like he himself knew how bitter old racist war vets live. The way he walked, talked, looked and everything showed the "cliche" lifestyle of a bitter old guy.

Him getting fond of his Asian next door neighbor who tried to steal his car was an

interesting concept and I think there is a lesson to be learned but come on, no one goes to the extreme length this old guy did just for the "love" of his neighbors.

The movie was very "natural" and a little bit extreme all in one. Most of all I thought it would be predictable but I was completely wrong.

Have you seen Will Smith's - Seven Pounds? He looked like he lost 70 pounds.

This movie was actually not the usual, I had strange feelings all through the movie. It seemed like they had a psychologist on staff who showed them ways to keep people raising their eyebrows, even when things seemed to be going good, you had this feeling of concern, you knew it was not time to relax just yet.

Unlike Gran Torino, Seven Pounds the movie, was unpredictable but at the end predictable which left me sick to my stomach (in a good way?).

Gran Torino: About an angry man
Seven Pounds: About an bitter man

Gran Torino: He had a secret.
Seven Pounds: He had a BIG secret.

Gran Torino: He helped other people
Seven Pounds: He helped other people.

Gran Torino: Lost spouse
Seven Pounds: Lost spouse

You know what's more interesting?
* In the end, both leading characters took drastic measures to save a loved one and got the same results. The same chilling results.

* At the end of both of these movies, I was just completely shocked.

I enjoyed Seven Pounds more than Gran Torino, some of you might enjoy Gran Torino more than Seven Pounds. Both movies were good but Seven Pounds was better.

Tell me what you think, which one of them did you like most?

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Posted By: Juliana - Category: No Category

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The Cost of Being A Vampire

December 11th 2008 16:48

Do you want to be a Vampire? Many people each day wish they were Vampires. The quickness, the fearlessness and just that adrenaline rush of knowing you are about to get "some". How about being the hottest looking kid in town or being able to find a good guy for yourself.

Twilight's Robert Pattinson who played Edward Cullen is saying he gets approached every time in public by fans who beg him to bite their necks, they even go to lengths of touching his hair (wow, really?) at least in Britain.
I guess like me they wish Bella Swan got that ever so painful but seemingly ecstatic neck bite.

I finally saw this movie recently and boy, I thought I was in love with a Vampire too for a moment. One strange thing I must say is that I thought Edward Cullen was strangely cute; like, when I first saw him from the corner of my eye he looked different but then I looked at him again and then he was gorgeous. Did you notice?

Everyone says he is handsome of course but I think he is that kind of person who if you look at him the wrong way, he isn't as cute but just take a second look, like reeeaally look again, then he looks cute.

I loved the movie. Hey, I love love stories and this one was one of the best, it kind of had a Romeo and Juliet feel to it though. Did I mention that I haven't read the book? Oh, I also heard that the sequel (New Moon) will be out in November of 09 and the next one will probably be released shorty after.

I thought it was a really good movie and I can't wait to see the sequel. Just one plea guys, um...it was not a true story, so... um...stop stalking the actors! Thanks!

102

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Why Changeling?

December 11th 2008 03:31

Changeling, Changeling, Changeling! This movie almost killed me. I knew it! I was in for a moment of anger, tears and cursing in my mind. I wanted to scream at Angelina Jolie so many times and I had never hated a little kid as much as I did watching that movie (it's okay. I'm fine now). Was it her character's "patience" which I called "slow". I mean I thought she should have just really pretended to be okay with everything but then make a really big surprise attack or something. And did you see the craziness that happened to her just for wanting to know the truth about the whereabouts of her son and to think this was a true story? Movies don't impress me so easily but I think Clint Eastwood did a fabulous job as the director especially J. Michael Straczynski who wrote it. Some people say they cried, I didn't. I personally felt like I needed to be the logical one since everyone in the movie wasn't taking action quick enough for my taste lol. Yeah, I was that into the movie. Well, I loved it. I really did. If you haven't seen it, please do. And by the way, was the LAPD that bad?

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Posted By: Juliana - Category: No Category

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Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2

December 9th 2008 22:23

So, yesterday I saw this movie - Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2. Ok, I loved the concept, their enduring friendship and dedication to one another, I wish I had a friend who would care enough for me to go help my parents out after telling her off and I wish I could go to Europe whenever I wanted with my best friends but please, we need more realistic movies people!
I mean, this movie was so cliche and unrealistic at the same time. They had the regular or should I say the supposedly typical friend-turned-angry-rocker-ch ick who ends up at a dead end job with a crazy boss and then gives away her boyfriend and gets him back when she wanted and ... oh did I tell you that he dated her best friends sister in between? And this same angry chick who ends up getting suspended from work finds herself in Greece. Where in America does that really happen? I mean I thought I was watching Sex and The City wanna be movie or something, like everyone can relate to a group of ladies who make some invisible money and can do or go wherever and if that was the case no one will be watching reality shows. I am not hating, I'm just being honest. I thought it was entertaining but I just think that if they wanted to come off like they were trying to relate to every other typical girl long-term friendship they should have tried being a little bit more realistic like not going all the way to Greece just to find a pair of pants. And I don't care about what the "other" reasons were (even if I know absolutely nothing about the book).

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Posted By: Juliana - Category: No Category

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Welcome All!

March 31st 2008 06:56

This is my new blog dedicated to the critique of television - especially docos and nightly news. This is my chance to bitch and moan about how inadequately the public is served by these institutions - especially the commerical channels! Please feel free to critique my critiques and add your own opinions and voices via the comments!

Cheers!

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Posted By: Mike Wheeler - Category: No Category

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July 2009

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June 2009

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December 2008

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