Jess ScheulerTrue Blood- Keep This Party Going
June 23rd 2009 02:14
Category: True Blood (Recaps, News & More)
In which Jason is everyone's favorite camper and Sookie gets taken for a ride....
We begin in the dungeon with Eric tossing a bloody limb at Lafayette. Hilariously, Eric demands to know how much blood is in his still tin-foiled hair, because Pam is gonna kill him for messing up her dye job. LaFayette makes it up to the Eric's office, where Eric sits on a stool wearing one of those salon capes (as if he needs to be protected from his own hair when he is covered in blood and entrails), while Eric continues to question him about the disappearance of Eddie. Eddie was the bored vampire who supplied him with blood to sell in exchange for LaFayette's "services". He was subsequently killed by Amy and inadvertently by Jason. But right now, Eric is having Lafayette thrown back into the dungeon until he knows what happened to Eddie. But Lafayette can't tell them what he doesn't know. Later, Lafayette is shot in the leg trying to escape Fangtasia and tries to convince Eric and Pam to change him into a vampire, as he is far more useful to them that way. But they decide to take a bite first.
Meanwhile, Jason is on a school bus on his way to Vampire hating camp. And everyone is SINGING. As if they were eight! And Jason, poor simple Jason, is radiant. The thing I love about him is how pure he seems, even when he's doing some very messed up things. He tries to make friends with a fellow hater/Abercrombie & Fitch model Luke. Things go sour with Luke when during a hot game of flag football, he gets jealous of Jason's wily moves on the field and he decides to play dirty. All that it takes is Jason's secret superpower, his six pack, to win the game, as he whips off his shirt and scores the winning touchdown. The Newlin's look on, full of Stackhouse love, as if they want to invite him over for a three-way.
Sookie and Bill fight about not fighting. And she tells him that he isn't treating Jessica like a person. But she's not a person. She's a vampire, Sookie. Geez. Also, Jessica's impressions of Bill are awesome. He leaves her alone for the night, so she suckers Sookie into letting her see her parent's house one last time. Since Sookie is a is a sucker both literally and figuratively, she drives her there.
Tara finds out that Eggs was in prison for many things, drugs, assault and being guilty of the second best abs on the show! But in the end she doesn't care, did I mention the abs? Maryann shows up at Merlotte's and proceeds to reek havoc on the locals by casting a magic spell making them all in heat. Sam tries to stand up for his bar, only to have her do her weird vibration thing and shifting him into a Collie. Sam, you got served. Sookie realizes something is not quite right with Maryann after listening to her thoughts and hearing a strange accent coming from them. And she invites Tara to move into the house with her.
Bill is getting hit on while shopping for some more "traditional" clothes for Jessica by the cougar looking saleslady when Eric shows up, with a shorter hairdo circa Brad Pitt in his Meet Joe Black phase. Needless to say, it looks hot. As does the track jacket, even hetero Bill notices and while they mutually check out Eric's hotness, the cougar saleslady assumes they are gay. Awesome. Even more awesome? Eric demands Sookie accompany him to Dallas to find a missing vampire sheriff. Predictably, Bill denies his demand, which at this point is useless, as there is no protecting Sookie from Eric's hotness. I have a feeling if you haven't fallen in love with Eric yet, you will next episode.
Jason keeps being hotter than a person should be at that creepy camp that just reminds me of the movie Saved! They have a blonde chick band play the camp, and at this point I fully expect to see Jenna Malone on keyboard and pastor Skip asking if they are down with the G-O-D? I digress. Then the Newlin's drag him on stage to "roleplay" and he snaps, nearly killing Mrs. Newlin after having flashbacks to vamp Eddie's death. But Mrs. Newlin was way too turned on by him nearly spearing her.
Jessica breaks her promise to stay in the car and Sookie runs in after her. She proceeds to call her mother "dumb" and tries to strangle her father for his past beatings of her with his belt. Bill shows up, glamors her little sister into letting him in and yells at Sookie to get the hell out before dealing with the family. How he's going to deal with it...tune in next week.
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